its an interesting abstracted piece and seems to have a slight social commentary emerging but my technique is everywhere and the anatomy and color isn’t popping…. So I cant really decide whether to let it go for a bit and concentrate on some new subject matter, or to keep plugging away at him and treating him as a challenge…. one of the competitions I am entering I have to offer them for sale and I know Aftermath is one of the best paintings to enter, but I dont want to sell him!

It goes: its all fun to read and if the results are good then you can be happy and excited and suitably awed, if the news is bad – its a load of hokum…. The Past: Watch your feelings, for although they could run away with you, they’ll also imbue you with superb artistic inspiration…. Then it came to my future ‘reading’ and I got: It’s all very well to be a creative genius but you’ll remain undiscovered unless you advertise your talents now.

This is evidenced by: attacking the back of the canvas to get at the scratchy noises poking a head around the wet paint to see what mommy is doing (getting paint on our cheeks) chewing brush ends trying to attack the moving scratchy thing walking in the shiny stuff and putting little orange and Naples yellow pawprints all over the table. doing most of these at once I hate putting her in the bedroom but it is necessary, she does not seem to learn or realize that she will get bopped with paint brushes (despite the evidence) or hauled out by the scruff and scrubbed on the cheeks and paws with yucky smelling stuff then rinsed ruthlessly…. In other cases she is abnormally bright, she actually worked out the torch trick and went for the hand controlling the torch (and every time since).

A better artist can look at an old woman and see the pretty girl that she used to be. But a great artist —a master —and that is what Auguste Rodin was —can look at an old woman, portray her exactly as she is… and force the viewer to see the pretty girl she used to be…. and more than that, he can make anyone with the sensitivity of an armadillo, or even you, see that this lovely young girl is still alive, not old and ugly at all, but simply prisoned inside her ruined body.

You expect the very best from people which takes the form of enthusiastic encouragement which is so charming that people try their best not to disappoint you…. You need to feel a deep and meaningful connection to your romantic partners, and go to great lengths to understand and please your mate…. However, you are very insightful about the underlying cause of conflicts, and an excellent communicator, so you have the tools to bring about a quick and peaceful resolution as long as you can keep control of your facilities.

I cant sing properly (it feels like I am singing through a muffler), I am useless psychically and I cannot paint to save myself…. all I can do is try to plan the next thing and not force it…. I am looking at new printers and hounding all the geeks I know, they must be sick of it now, but I am so sick of getting shite printers so I really really want the right one for me.

the more I use my Mac the more I love its simplicity, its superior speed and handling and its complete lifestyle. I have been a avid PC user for so many years but I got so sick of all the spyware and virus’ and fell in love with the elegance of Macs both in the OS and the machines themselves…. I also love the proteus chat client, its interactivity with my Mac address book and the look puts it over fire in my opinion.

It has come to my attention that, although I regret taking so much time away from Painting it has been very beneficial for my art. To quote a brilliant book – “waiting is filled” I think I may have made the transition from “competent draftsman” to “artist”…. I am now learning to take the subject and make it my own, using the techniques I have learned and turning them on their heads…. This is the historical method of learning and it has given me a good eye and excellent technique.

And the more you keep working in the mold the more you feel you belong?… Being crippled has really helped me work out a number of things, my girlfriend Ally says it sounds like I have been on a meditation retreat (she went on a 10 day one with non stop meditation, celibacy and silence – a big ask for her but she did it and got a lot out of it!… I ended up in therapy and almost had another breakdown, all of this should have pointed me in the right direction but I guess you need to hit me over the head with a car before I get a point !